Here is a link to one of the paintings by Salvador Dali, which i has fasinated me forever -> http://www.indstate.edu/ctl/vlessons/dali2.jpg
There are so many times/phases in my life in which i have one thru considerable amount of turmoil and have been swept off by a feeling of absolute despair.
And finally after reaching the ultimate peak, there is a feeling of absolute loneliness. A state which is beyond all feeling, which is reached more often than not after sheer exhauting of all physical, mental and emotional faculities. This is a state of silence. A silence which is meta-physical ; one thats very different in nature from "lack of noise". It has an element of purity in it. Probably a vague parallel to highlight the qualitative difference would be, feeling of calmness upon experiencing a gush of cool breeze in a mountain top as against watching the world sitting in side a frosted glass chamber.
A after attaining this state, all the hopelessness, despair and struggle vanishes; leaving space for something which we always keep running away from and thats "ourselves".
We hardly have the nerve to listen, acknowledge and face our inner voice. So many attempts are made in a span of a single day to sub due anything remotely close. We drown ourselves in innumerable worries and anxiety, which not only clogs so much of our "system resources" but also at the sametime blocks any passage that leads us inwards. Resulting in a reactive state in which we try to look for all things that require inner attention (peace, happiness, love) at all places external, but all in vain.
Finally after all the effort wheb we lay exhausted and completly exerted, there comes a relization thats so natural (sahaj) in nature that entire effort of a life time seems to be in vain.
Tuesday, August 01, 2006
Faith
Asatoma Sadgamaya
Thamaso Maa Jyothir Gamaya
Mrithyor Maa Amrutham Gamaya
Aum Shanti Shanti Shantihi
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This is 1st time I read ur blog n only this post.
just wanna tell, what ur facing now..may be ur in tumultous phase of life..but rem one thng u alwasy dream to be in the top peak which nobody else tried n actually they dint had guts to make..so celebrate ur success..n move on life with no regrets hre after...
Hope next time ur post has some spicy and zealous stuffs , which tells ur happy being at top.
P.S: Every is victimised with this state , as ur mentioned in this post!
I can kind of relate to what you are saying. You find yourself standing alone on the face of the earth and there is pitch darkness. You feel so helpless. You ask God why he gave you the mirage of support. Just when your frustration is about to peak, you see a light. I am not trying to say that God exists. But the solution to all problems is within you. Sometimes nobody can help you salvage a situation. It is entirely in your hands.