Saturday, August 27, 2011

Dynamic stillness

Being a weekend I did not have to go through the alarm – snooze – snooze some more – OMG!!! I am late @#$%^& – swear some more – get ready – rush– office commute grind and had the luxury of getting up as I pleased. Made the best of this luxury by waking up well past the time by which I am usually at office. This is one simple and silly comparison always makes me feel good :)

The first thing I did after waking was opened all the windows. Thankfully the place where I stay is a peaceful one, which I think is a luxury in this maddening city. The brightness of the day, the soft clatter of the rain and the chirping of sparrows makes the perfect de-stress package for me. Always makes feel more relaxed and peaceful from inside. More so when I am aware that I have the luxury of time and can just sit near the window till as long as I feel and admire the rains, and don’t have to step out at all. These are the days when I truly enjoy the fabled Mumbai Monsoons.

Went through the tea – biscuit – newspaper routine. Once done with it, noticed outside the window, it was raining continuously in a steady flow. And sitting on the other side of the window, was me, with a thousand thoughts clattering my mind. The sound of the rains and the flow of thoughts in my head where at the exact same frequency and going on in an endless loop. Both of us enveloped in our own sweet obsession and compulsion.

And there right between me and the rains outside, sitting on the window ledge noticed the money-plant creeper sitting so very still, almost in a Zen like state, full of calmness and composure.

In my typical manner I would have loved to sermonize about it. But urge doesn’t seem to be there. Instead of obsessing myself to draw conclusions, for once I decided to enjoy this moment as it is, its dynamic stillness and share it just that way. 

Monday, August 22, 2011

On Pain and Love

In a workshop on "Self Healing through Creative Writing", that I attended last weekend during one of the exercises we were told to explore various themes in our lives and make space for them to surface and express themselves. This often is the first step towards closure. Catharsis through writing is something I had been  doing for a while but then over the last few months had totally stopped. This has lead to a strong feeling of frustration at my inability to express.

However over the course of this two day workshop, I took the courage to once again let the feelings take over and express themselves through words. Some of them came in a natural flow, whereas others are still in the process of taking shape.

Following a Haiku like structure, using word economy and visualization here is what I wrote on two central themes of my life -

On Pain -

Pain striked
Cold numbness followed
I kept breathing
Life moved on 

On love -

Your embrace
Tender and warm
Heals me
Completes me

There are also two verses that I wrote in Hindi, which I have also posted on my hindi blog


चार कोस 
जीवन यात्रा 
प्रारब्ध, प्रारंभ
विस्मय और अंत 


स्याह शाम में 
सिमट गयी 
सारे शेहेर की उदासी 
और मेरे मन का अँधेरा 

This was an attempt from my end to atleast get started with writing, the way I had done it in the past and hope to keep exploring and keep posting more.

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